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| by comrade commissar | Thomas | @ Sunday, January 02, 2005, 10:03:00 PM | permalink |
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Dear Lord, I was at Kids' Church today. It's the last Sunday I'll be spending there before I enlist for NS. We went out for lunch together after church. During the eatin', I took time to subtly appreciate everyone 1 at a time. Its great to make people smile, all the more when you're being sincere and honest at the same time. We also reminisced about the years I've spent together with all the volunteers in the Kids' Church.. "helpers" & "teachers" alike. 7 years is a blink of an eye for You huh? Had that feeling just now. Life is too short man, Time is overrated. Everyone was extremely nice. Like it was going to be my last supper. In a way, everything else in my life at the moment also has a similar mood. I'm spring cleaning my room. I'm repairing my computer & have reregistered my internet account. I'm trying to iron out outstanding issues, & things I've not come around to do previously, like pasting photos of my friends up on my wall. I'm working with a deadline in mind. Because I am going away & I am coming back, I have to prepare the place with the little time I have left. God, thank You for C. S. Lewis. Although the analogies he used to illustrate abstract Christian ideals may be imperfect at times, they have helped aid me in better understanding things I did not before. I went down to the Esplanade with some friends to celebrate & usher in the New Year. The performances were paused for a moment, & the MC requested "a minute of silence in memory & reflection of the recent calamity." I closed my eyes & breathed in deep. If "silence" meant an absence of sound, I think the distant jeers of airhorns & the uncaring chatter of the suffocating crowd outside the performance arena where I was, the impatient whispers of "1 minute how long ah?", "need to wait how many more seconds?" among my surrounding peers, were aural antonyms. I was hurt & angered. Then, I realised - What right do I have to be? Does this gesture do anything towards lessening the suffering among the multitudes of races & nationalities today? Was it all merely an act of hypocritical outward expression? I do not know what I really feel, I hope You do. Because I might have made an impromptu speech to the children in church today about the need to carpe diem & reach out - to show others around them the love & joy that You are, but on 1st January 2005, 12:30+am, I shook my booty & boogied to Electrico's live performance of their track, "Studman". There's no question of a right erasing out a wrong. I still feel like a filthy piece of crap. God, I dedicate my next 2 years in the army to You. I ask for strength & comfort in the coming times where I will surely need them. I asked for the same qualities when I worked at McDonalds 2 years ago. Even at the most bewildering & chaotic of cash-counter moments, even when I made mistakes, even when I really did an outstanding job of causing spectacular fast-food restaurant disasters, You were there. In the late hours, when I was sweeping, mopping, cleaning toilets till 2am, You made it tolerable. It rocks to work at a place when your partner is the creator of the Universe. How else am I to explain kind customers, great colleagues & understanding managers? Jesus, You have to be my army buddy when I go to Tekong on 8th January. No one else will/can look out for me twenty-four seven. Amen. |
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Yo, bro hope u read this in time b4 yr enlistment...
hey, sounds like u'll b gone 4ever, 2 years is blink of an eye, but its the three months you have to endure. Try not to "sign" too much for stay-in weekends. Well, like what you said, army is a fire batisim, I believe God will surely mould,stretch, contract,expand,skew and change u inside-out. I expecting a diff thomas after 2 years, you'll be more of what you realli are. Stay faithful always! ;)
p.s you haven appreciate me yet! ;p
- by comrade 
Jason @ times 12:06 AM, January 03, 2005
[delete? click on the dustbin.]
May God be with you in the Army to take care of you and to give you strength. And may He also use you to reflect His love and wisdom to others. Take care of yourself in the army, buddy.
- by comrade Jeiel Aranal @ times 12:37 AM, January 03, 2005
[delete? click on the dustbin.]
actually, bmt's a breeze and the beginning of all sianness of NS life, as opposed to contrary thinking of bmt to be the hellish part of the service.
that is, if, you get into combat vocation after bmt.
remember. don't be a spec.
man or officer.
good luck and godspeed with your NS.
ldb aka turbochicken
- by comrade 
@ times 12:28 PM, January 17, 2005
[delete? click on the dustbin.]
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<--latest post-- undertaker--post temp work shellshock syndrome--either aging or turning gay - recent music listenings--walk idiot walk--mental navigation thru' immense volumes--the swarms of flying pigs appeared from nowhere & ...--war chant for self--no chance to survive, make your time.--disclaimers, updates & miscellaneous--catharsis-- --last post--> |
